Relationship advice dating a divorced man
The thing about anger is that it uses up a lot of energy and space in your separated man’s brain and heart.
That’s energy and space that he can’t and won’t channel into you in positive ways. He doesn’t consistently spend time with his children.
Child support payments are based on the cold hard numbers reported by both spouses in their tax returns. Like it or not, he has financial responsibilities in taking care of his kids, period.
I would be gravely concerned about a man’s character if he did not want to fulfill those commitments. Whether he was the perpetrator of infidelity or the victim, the tailwinds of cheating bring an ugly stench to the divorce process.
If you chose to proceed in dating him, I caution you to proceed slowly and with eyes wide open. Comments like, “Bah, I just want it over,” or “Doesn’t matter, we’ve been strangers for years,” may seem casual, even confident — but they also mask what’s going on underneath and behind the scenes.
My concern, however, is that women are blindly and/or naively getting involved with separated men without understanding the huge risk: that is, . If your separated man consistently avoids talking about his divorce or says things to minimize or downplay it, consider it a warning sign worth flagging.You also end up keeping company with someone who is aloof, moody, defensive and/or crabby. If your separated man isn’t seeing much of his kids, this should be seen as a warning, not a “bonus” (cause it’s more time spent with you, right? One reason he’s not parenting could be because he and his wife are disagreeing over child custody and access.Maybe she’s maliciously blocking the kids from seeing him, maybe she has excellent reason to block him, maybe a court date (or five) lies ahead in his future.More often than not, it’s anger, self-pity, and feelings of entitlement that fuel a man’s complaints over support. So if you decide to stick around, I’d recommend you prepare for more than a nose full.He might feel he deserves more of a say, more over how she spends the money, among other things. If he was the perpetrator: Though some experts say, “Once a cheater, always a cheater”, I personally think that some people can learn from past mistakes.